A risky sport at Christmas
Giving and getting it right
The yearly ritual returns: choosing the best gifts for our loved ones (and for those we’re not so fond of). It sounds easy, but it isn’t: according to eBay, a third of Spaniards returned their presents last year. Where do we go wrong? Why do we buy socks when we’re asked for a book? Writers, actresses, artists and journalists answer.
Every December the same scene repeats itself: the moment comes to hand over the gifts we’ve invested so much time — and money — in. Although you don’t want to get your hopes up too much, deep down you’re hoping for the book by that brilliant author you’ve been talking about to your partner for so many nights, the remastered seasons of your favorite ’90s show that have just come out in a special edition and that you’ve made a show of almost buying more than once in front of your best friend, or even the latest phone you fervently believed would finally drag you out of the stone age. But no. Your joy sinks like a stone when you find a Christmas-themed sweater embroidered by your mother, wrapped in snowman-print paper. Not to mention the fuzzy socks, the underwear two sizes too big, or that dress you’d never wear but that your aunt thought was perfect. What happened? Did they not understand you when you told them what you wanted? And if you’re the one who bought it, where did you go wrong, and whose fault is it?
According to a study by Indiana University from this very year, when it comes to choosing a gift, “the giver thinks about the moment of exchange, but not about how useful the gift will be to the recipient.” This is where the main mistake lies: the giver wants their present to be tangible and expensive, while the person receiving it is thinking of something useful, something that sparks interest or desire, and that also reflects something about their relationship with the person giving it. eBay, through the consultancy TNS, published this month that worldwide, 66% value giving and receiving a gift with real feeling behind it. The British Journal of Experimental Social Psychology also stated in 2016 that recipients end up disappointed by the lack of personality in the gifts they receive. It added: “Gifts tend to be chosen based on what the recipients are like, rather than what they like.” As if it wouldn’t be so much easier just to ask…
At Yo Dona, at the risk of spending yet another holiday season with a pile of unworn underwear, we asked 10 prominent women how they usually enjoy these days and, of course, how to get gifting right.
What are your plans?
Anni B Sweet · Singer
“A dinner among friends or a good book” would be her ideal gifts, and although she admits she likes giving presents, the obligation to do so on these specific dates puts her off a little. She also falls into the camp of those who dislike Christmas: “It’s not an occasion that makes me feel anything special.” The artist will use this month to keep working on her new album and to visit her family.
By Irene Nadal · Illustration: Valéry Goulet · Source: Yo Dona no. 659, December 16, 2017.